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So, we’re two episodes into NYC Prep, Bravo TV’s reality response to Gossip Girl.

The (Unattractive) Cast of NYC Prep

The (Unattractive) Cast of NYC Prep

Who’s your favorite character thus far? Are you buying any of this bullshit? High school kids, hanging out in totally EMPTY lounges in Manhattan? GTFOH.

Let’s run it down by quotes:

Says Sebastian: “Why date one girl when you can, like, date a bunch?”
Please stop flipping your hair. Who do you think you are? A young Brad Pitt. EPIC FUCKING FAIL.

Says PC: “Everything in New York City is about pulling connections. It’s who you know, and how much money you have. And it’s really sad? And I’m not saying I’m like that? But that’s what New York is: money is power.”
FYI, You could never be Chuck Bass. You may have his money, but you can’t pay for that kind of swagger. Put your credit card back in your pocket sweetie.

Says Jessie: “You don’t wear all your labels at once, and I think it’s very important to mix and match.”
Darling. Hate to break it to you angel, but you’re slightly cross-eyed. And you have a Jay Leno chin. Sorry—can’t get past that.

Says Kelli: “We don’t do homework. We don’t work.”
You want to be a singer? Puh-leeze. Oh, and as for the Sebastian-Kelli-Taylor triangle, it must suck to constantly come in second.

Says Camille: “I don’t want to apologize for having money. It’s good.’’
You look mildly retarded. Thank fuck your parents have money, otherwise life would be just a little different for you. It always is for girls with unfortunate faces. Like yours.

Says Taylor: “It’s good to be perceived as having money.”
Oh, poor little Taylor. You’re so cute, but why did you let them film in your apartment? That was the beginning of the end for you.

Just my thoughts on this scripted piece of shit show.

(And yes, I’ll be watching this week. And next.)

Bisou Bisou, Belle

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The Girls of The City 

 

The Girls of The City

 

So, I seriously tried super hard to not watch the premiere of The City last night on MTV, but unfortunately I did. As ashamed as I am to admit it, I’m kind of hooked. Here’s why:

1) I can’t wait to see Whitney’s apartment. I live Manhattan on the UES (5th Avenue to be exact), and I’m wondering if we’ll be neighbors… I hope not, because I’m sure Ms. Port is pulling down a much larger paycheck than I, thanks to MTV. Plus, I think her neighborhood of choice will decipher whether or not she’s a downtown girl vs. and uptown social. My guess? Soho so she’ll be kind of close to Erin Lucas (who resides in Gramercy) or Tribeca, so she’ll be close to her DVF office (which is in the Meatpacking District). Who knows? As smitten as she is with the loser known only as Jay, she’ll probably try to move right next door to him. It’s funny; I never thought of Whitney as a boy-chaser. Then again, her onscreen L.A. BFF is LC/Lauren Conrad, who changes boys like she changes her bras. Now it makes sense! Whitney totally is the new Lauren; shitty faux-friends and boy drama to boot!

***Editor’s Update: Whitney is a downtown resident, living in Gramercy, right around the corner from her BFF Erin. I was right-I knew she’d take the downtown route.***

2) As I previously predicted, little Olivia Palermo has been cast as the jealous, snide, snobby, rich bitch. Ah, well. I’m sure she’ll relish in the moment. All press is good press, right? Every time someone utters the words Olivia Palermo, her name on the social radar will rise, rise, rise. Tinsley Mortimer who? Your quickie spot on Gossip Girl is nothing compared to this. Tinsley dear, you’re cute for NYC, but Olivia is going international baby!

3) I’d LOVE to see Whitney doing something other than shuffling models onto the catwalk like they’re cattle. Please tell me she has another skill when it comes to fashion? Why does everyone praise her for excelling at such a mundane task? BTW, I was backstage at the DVF show in September, and I saw Whitney “working” for a total of 4 minutes. It was as if she only filmed this scene, and then magically disappeared.

4) Speaking of her fashion skills, did anyone notice how skanky Whitney looked last night? Even she noticed it-the camera panned in just as she was tugging at the hem of her LBD on her way to dinner with Jay. Also in the picture above, what’s with dressing her in micro-minis? I know the New York Post/Page Six Magazine prematurely anointed her the new Carrie Bradshaw, but come on! Dress the girl with a little dignity; she was much chicer on The Hills. Can’t wait to see what other skimpy outfits the wardrobe department dresses her in.

Whitney Port = Carrie Bradshaw? Puh-lease.

Whitney Port = Carrie Bradshaw? Puh-lease.

5) Isn’t Olivia’s cousin Nevan the bitchiest pinenut you’ve ever seen? It runs in the family I guess. He’s the real star here; can’t wait to see what kind of shenanigans he pulls.

Bisou Bisou,

Belle

So, I get that they’re friends, but Genevieve Jones and Marc Jacobs? Kissing? Woah.

genevieve-jones-marc-jacobs-kissing

And not just smooching. Snitches say they were full-on deep kissing at the Mango flagship store opening in Manhattan last night. (I’m on the hunt for photos. I would have been there to witness this travesty myself, but I’m currently in South America right now on a mini-vacay.)

We all know Marc is gay with a capital G, and we all know Genevieve is a faghag with a capital HAG, but this is a little much for me… especially since she was recently spotted locking lips with Ricky, as in Dee & Ricky, the genius twin design duo behind Marc’s lego accessories collection.

Genevieve Jones Kissing Ricky

I have always prided myself with being rather liberal, and I am a huge hag myself, but kissing mon amis? Too personal for me.

Bisou Bisou, 

Belle


olivia-palermo-100

So this one has been on my radar for quite sometime, but other than the whole ‘Please-Be-My-Friend’ email snafu [click HERE to read it], I haven’t cared much about Olivia Palermo, until I realized she’d been cast as the villain in MTV’s new The Hills spinoff show, The City, opposite boring-as-they-fucking-come Whitney Port.

Here’s the sheer hilarity about it all:

1) Olivia Palermo is LOADED. Other than muse, what other position would this socialite have at DVF? MTV is killing me by getting these rich girls faux gigs for the sake of “reality.” The least they could do was get her a position with Chanel or YSL. (Maybe they tried?)

2) Even though The City doesn’t premiere until late December, they’ve done a fabulous job of pitting fans against Olivia already. Did you see how the camera panned in on Olivia’s face, looking rather…devious? [Click HERE to see the snoozefest/trailer for The City].

3) Why would Olivia even want to be on this show? It’s sure to become a camp hit like its successor, but seriously-a socialite on MTV? A reality show? Really? We all saw Tinsley on Gossip Girl, but guest starring is totally fine-fake acting is not. According the the email she supposedly penned, doesn’t she want to be taken seriously by her peers? This surely won’t help.

Nevertheless, I’ll be watching. For Olivia obviously, not Whitney. I’m loving the whole brunette vs. blonde thing. I only hope that this time, the brunette wins.

P.S. I ran into her at a jewelry event at The Plaza earlier this week, and she’s definitely two times skinnier in person than she is in snaps. The girl MUST survive on ice and water. Wish. I. Had. The. Strength.

Bisou Bisou,

Belle

Let me preface this by saying that I am Genevieve Jones’s biggest fashion fan. I think she is always fan-fucking-tabulous from head-to-toe. She drapes the finest frocks on her lithe willowy frame, is BFF with Marc Jacobs and Zac Posen, and rolls with the most fashionable crew on the isle of Manhattan-all of which makes me think of one word when I came across this snap of her below: WHY?!?!?!?!??!?!?

Genevieve Jones

Genevieve Jones

That jacket + the diaper shorts + the sheer tights paired with those shoes. I get personal style, but DAMN, I never thought I’d see the day when I didn’t go gaga for Genevieve’s look. Never say never.

Better luck next time babe.

Bisou Bisou,

Belle

Marchesa Minus One?

Rumor has it that dollfaced designer Georgina Chapman (a.k.a. Mrs. Harvey Weinstein) has professionally parted ways with her BFF/partner Keren Craig

Marchesa's Keren Craig and Georgina Chapman

Keren Craig and Georgina Chapman

Here’s the kicker: Apparently Harvey and Georgina may have BOUGHT Keren out of her half of the business, leaving Georgina to take all of the credit for the brand moving forward.

On one hand, it makes sense. Georgina is easily the most recognizable face of the two, has a much more interesting personal story, and her very own Daddy Warbucks as her other half. Why shouldn’t she take full control?

I personally think this is grimy, but hey-it’s business. Loving to see how this one will play out. We’re on it.

Bisou Bisou,

Belle

Hi all!

So, who knew they were even friends! Jaci Reid + Estelle + John Legend+Morris Reid? I guess…

Either way, Mrs. Reid darling, you look fabulous, as usual. I guess you DIDN’T have a bun in the oven after all.

Bisou Bisou,

Belle

Snaps via WireImage